Jenny's date she considered obese.
For his dick she searched in every crease.
When she could find no trace,
She just sat on his face.
Leaving him to find his own release.
From the Date Series.
Limericks and erotic fiction. Fantasy and fun for the connoisseur of fine erotica... and just plain silly horny humor.
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Seeking Jenny
If I lost her my life would be bleaker.
All over the world I would seek her.
Jenny's so near perfection.
She gets all my affection.
If only she would let me Greek her.
From the Anal Series.
All over the world I would seek her.
Jenny's so near perfection.
She gets all my affection.
If only she would let me Greek her.
From the Anal Series.
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Pro Preference
Speaking of sex, one thing is for sure:
For my doldrums you've offered a cure.
Your unique expertise,
On your back or your knees,
Future partners will seem amateur.
For my doldrums you've offered a cure.
Your unique expertise,
On your back or your knees,
Future partners will seem amateur.
Monday, December 27, 2010
Simple Needs
I want someone to appreciate me.
Not to chastise, harangue or berate me.
I don't care much about looks,
Or if she cleans, sews or cooks.
As long as each day she'll fellate me.
Not to chastise, harangue or berate me.
I don't care much about looks,
Or if she cleans, sews or cooks.
As long as each day she'll fellate me.
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Explorer
Jenny knows I'd do anything for her.
Even become an Antarctic explorer.
I'd race to the South Pole,
Bring it back to her whole.
All to show just how much I adore her.
Even become an Antarctic explorer.
I'd race to the South Pole,
Bring it back to her whole.
All to show just how much I adore her.
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Christmas: The Greatest Gift
On Christmas morning, under the tree
There's just one thing that I want to see:
Jenny, draped in fine furs,
Saying, "Honey, I'm all yours!"
The greatest gift there could ever be.
There's just one thing that I want to see:
Jenny, draped in fine furs,
Saying, "Honey, I'm all yours!"
The greatest gift there could ever be.
Friday, December 24, 2010
Christmas Eve
Down the lane we hear carolers' hums.
As we sleep, dreaming of sugarplums.
Santa's destinations are many.
But when he stops to see Jenny,
It won't be down the chimney he comes.
As we sleep, dreaming of sugarplums.
Santa's destinations are many.
But when he stops to see Jenny,
It won't be down the chimney he comes.
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Mentally Challenged
Since the very first day I met you, kid,
Thinking of you has rendered me stupid.
I have no concentration
Beyond our assignations.
I blame that little pink bastard Cupid.
Thinking of you has rendered me stupid.
I have no concentration
Beyond our assignations.
I blame that little pink bastard Cupid.
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Smokin'
When I say Jenny's body is smokin'
You have to know that I'm not jokin'
I feel flames of desire,
Like a four-alarm fire,
When it's her tight hot pussy I'm pokin'
You have to know that I'm not jokin'
I feel flames of desire,
Like a four-alarm fire,
When it's her tight hot pussy I'm pokin'
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Brown
Jenny's nails have been polished dark brown.
Somber shades usually cause me to frown.
But my mood has to lighten,
When her grip starts to tighten.
And I love to watch when she goes down.
From the Nails Series.
Somber shades usually cause me to frown.
But my mood has to lighten,
When her grip starts to tighten.
And I love to watch when she goes down.
From the Nails Series.
Monday, December 20, 2010
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Stunning
Darling Jenny's so gorgeous and stunning,
To see her I gladly go running.
She's such a great beauty,
It's my pleasurable duty,
To give her the lingus that's cunning.
To see her I gladly go running.
She's such a great beauty,
It's my pleasurable duty,
To give her the lingus that's cunning.
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Inspires
On this day all I want is to write,
Of dear Jenny, my earthly delight.
I'm so under her spell,
My thoughts constantly dwell,
On the joy I feel when she's in sight.
So sexy poem after poem I will pen.
Counting minutes 'till I see her again.
Recounting the stories,
Of our past bedroom glories.
And the love I feel for my precious friend.
Of dear Jenny, my earthly delight.
I'm so under her spell,
My thoughts constantly dwell,
On the joy I feel when she's in sight.
So sexy poem after poem I will pen.
Counting minutes 'till I see her again.
Recounting the stories,
Of our past bedroom glories.
And the love I feel for my precious friend.
Friday, December 17, 2010
Bodybuilder
Jenny's muscular date loved to flex,
Showing off his biceps, abs and pecs.
His firm calves, glutes and thighs
Benefit from exercise.
It's a shame he was so bad at sex.
From the Date Series.
Showing off his biceps, abs and pecs.
His firm calves, glutes and thighs
Benefit from exercise.
It's a shame he was so bad at sex.
From the Date Series.
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Pennies
To experience a great "friend with bennies"
The place you should be is at Jenny's.
Hurry, give her a ring.
And be sure that you bring,
A donation of 30,000 pennies.
The place you should be is at Jenny's.
Hurry, give her a ring.
And be sure that you bring,
A donation of 30,000 pennies.
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Lip Smacking
The last time that I left Jenny's place,
I declined the chance to wash my face.
Had just spent my whole hour,
Licking her luscious flower.
And all day I recalled her sweet taste.
I declined the chance to wash my face.
Had just spent my whole hour,
Licking her luscious flower.
And all day I recalled her sweet taste.
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Quick
As I tug on my stiff, swollen dick,
Wet with lube, he's all shiny and slick.
He is primed to explode.
I expect a huge load.
Could you please jerk me off? I'll be quick!
Wet with lube, he's all shiny and slick.
He is primed to explode.
I expect a huge load.
Could you please jerk me off? I'll be quick!
Monday, December 13, 2010
Wages of Sin
What we're doing is called fornication.
Sex should only be for procreation.
The fact that we do it,
Is so wrong that -- oh, screw it!
It's been worth the eternal damnation.
Sex should only be for procreation.
The fact that we do it,
Is so wrong that -- oh, screw it!
It's been worth the eternal damnation.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Naïf
In the ways of sex I was naive.
Now in its greatest joys I believe.
In Jenny I did discover,
Such a wonderful lover.
With her, ecstacy we both achieve.
Now in its greatest joys I believe.
In Jenny I did discover,
Such a wonderful lover.
With her, ecstacy we both achieve.
Saturday, December 11, 2010
Gift Bag
My affection for Jenny is total.
I have many great tales anecdotal.
All she does feels so great.
I most appreciate
Her attention to everything scrotal.
I have many great tales anecdotal.
All she does feels so great.
I most appreciate
Her attention to everything scrotal.
Friday, December 10, 2010
New Delhi
Jenny's date was a chap from New Delhi.
As a gift he brought her mango jelly.
He loved when they would screw,
But at the end he withdrew.
Then he squirted hot cum on her belly.
From the Date Series.
As a gift he brought her mango jelly.
He loved when they would screw,
But at the end he withdrew.
Then he squirted hot cum on her belly.
From the Date Series.
Thursday, December 9, 2010
The End
When Jenny decides to retire,
No longer my lover for hire,
I'll contact my heirs,
Arrange all my affairs,
And jump on a funeral pyre.
No longer my lover for hire,
I'll contact my heirs,
Arrange all my affairs,
And jump on a funeral pyre.
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Academy Award
I love when I make Jenny squeal.
Though I'm sometimes unsure if it's real.
She might be a good actress.
Seems she's had lots of practice.
I'll admit how great it makes me feel.
Though I'm sometimes unsure if it's real.
She might be a good actress.
Seems she's had lots of practice.
I'll admit how great it makes me feel.
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Manicure
Dear Jenny it seems never fails,
To always have beautiful nails.
She knows just how much,
My cock loves their touch.
It's one of my fav'rite details.
From the Nails Series.
To always have beautiful nails.
She knows just how much,
My cock loves their touch.
It's one of my fav'rite details.
From the Nails Series.
Monday, December 6, 2010
Cure All
If life's pressure sometimes derails you,
Erectile function repeatedly fails you.
There's a guaranteed cure.
It's foolproof, that's for sure.
Doctor Jenny can take care of what ails you.
If her cute face and hot body don't do it,
Wait 'till she kneels before you and goes to it.
If even that's not enough,
When you taste her sweet muff,
You can't help but get rock hard and screw it.
Erectile function repeatedly fails you.
There's a guaranteed cure.
It's foolproof, that's for sure.
Doctor Jenny can take care of what ails you.
If her cute face and hot body don't do it,
Wait 'till she kneels before you and goes to it.
If even that's not enough,
When you taste her sweet muff,
You can't help but get rock hard and screw it.
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Cold
The beauteous Jenny, I'm told,
Has something that she's never sold.
So you'd be a nut,
Don't ask for her butt,
Or she'll put you right out in the cold.
From the Anal Series.
Has something that she's never sold.
So you'd be a nut,
Don't ask for her butt,
Or she'll put you right out in the cold.
From the Anal Series.
Saturday, December 4, 2010
In Training
Darling Jenny is helping me practice.
So I learn what the right way to act is.
I have great confidence,
In her experience.
Knowing she's seen more pricks than a cactus.
So I learn what the right way to act is.
I have great confidence,
In her experience.
Knowing she's seen more pricks than a cactus.
Friday, December 3, 2010
Messy
When the time finally came for his pop, he
Squirted her face and made her all sloppy.
Though annoyed by the mess,
Jenny smiled nonetheless,
While his big dick went all soft and floppy.
From the Date Series.
Squirted her face and made her all sloppy.
Though annoyed by the mess,
Jenny smiled nonetheless,
While his big dick went all soft and floppy.
From the Date Series.
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Nipple Lust
When I think of your nipples I drool.
I'm a hopelessly breast-loving fool.
They're so pink and delicious.
My one fondest wish is,
To rub against them with my tool.
I'm a hopelessly breast-loving fool.
They're so pink and delicious.
My one fondest wish is,
To rub against them with my tool.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Wake-Up Call
I'd love to see you every morning.
I might just stop by without warning.
Just your kiss and a hug,
Picks me up like a drug.
My day then would never be boring.
I might just stop by without warning.
Just your kiss and a hug,
Picks me up like a drug.
My day then would never be boring.
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