Even after a stock market crash,
It's worth every cent of my cash.
To hear Jenny's sighs,
When my head's 'tween her thighs,
And her pubes give my face a moustache.
Limericks and erotic fiction. Fantasy and fun for the connoisseur of fine erotica... and just plain silly horny humor.
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Friday, December 30, 2011
Tres Penes
Jenny's date was not one guy, but three!
Triplets out for a hot sexy spree.
The first paid the full price.
Second made her come twice.
Jenny jerked off the third one for free.
From the Date Series.
Triplets out for a hot sexy spree.
The first paid the full price.
Second made her come twice.
Jenny jerked off the third one for free.
From the Date Series.
Thursday, December 29, 2011
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
Monday, December 26, 2011
Sunday, December 25, 2011
Grand Design
I just love how the Good Lord designed her.
I thank Jesus that He helped me find her.
Knowing Jenny, I'm blessed.
I feel God's love the best
When we're fucking and I am behind her.
I thank Jesus that He helped me find her.
Knowing Jenny, I'm blessed.
I feel God's love the best
When we're fucking and I am behind her.
Saturday, December 24, 2011
Two Surprises
He showed up at her door, unannounced.
Flung it open, and on him she pounced.
For an hour they played...
Quite the sex escapade.
Sad to say, but his check to her bounced.
Flung it open, and on him she pounced.
For an hour they played...
Quite the sex escapade.
Sad to say, but his check to her bounced.
Friday, December 23, 2011
Stripper
Jenny's date, a male stripper, was ripped.
Sadly, though, he was not well equipped.
Ladies loved when he'd dance,
Until he dropped his pants.
It affected how much he was tipped.
From the Date Series.
Sadly, though, he was not well equipped.
Ladies loved when he'd dance,
Until he dropped his pants.
It affected how much he was tipped.
From the Date Series.
Thursday, December 22, 2011
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Up Periscope
Out the top of my Jockeys he's peeking.
Lovely Jenny's attention he's seeking.
She reacts when she sees it.
Slides my shorts down and frees it.
She knows just what I want without speaking.
Lovely Jenny's attention he's seeking.
She reacts when she sees it.
Slides my shorts down and frees it.
She knows just what I want without speaking.
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Skin
The mere touch of your nails on my skin
Motivates me to hot carnal sin.
Fingers raked 'cross my back
Prompts a sexy attack,
Leaving me for days with a big grin.
From the Nails Series.
Motivates me to hot carnal sin.
Fingers raked 'cross my back
Prompts a sexy attack,
Leaving me for days with a big grin.
From the Nails Series.
Monday, December 19, 2011
Sunday, December 18, 2011
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Club Med
Spent a great week with Jenny at Club Med.
We had fun on the beach and in bed.
She said she loved the times
When I wrote her fresh rhymes.
As for me, it's when I gave her head.
From the Vacation Series.
We had fun on the beach and in bed.
She said she loved the times
When I wrote her fresh rhymes.
As for me, it's when I gave her head.
From the Vacation Series.
Friday, December 16, 2011
Fishy Faux Pas
Jenny's date: a gourmet chef named Billy.
Cooked her salmon; we know that was silly.
He thought she enjoyed fish
And would eat up this dish,
When she said how much she loved "Free Willy".
From the Date Series.
Cooked her salmon; we know that was silly.
He thought she enjoyed fish
And would eat up this dish,
When she said how much she loved "Free Willy".
From the Date Series.
Thursday, December 15, 2011
Unity
I'm aware that I have a small unit.
You're too gracious to ever impugn it.
To maximize its appearance
I do pubic-hair clearance.
'Fore I see you I carefully groom it.
You're too gracious to ever impugn it.
To maximize its appearance
I do pubic-hair clearance.
'Fore I see you I carefully groom it.
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Liquid Gratitude
All you've done - I can never repay you.
But I have an idea - what say you?
I'll come over, undress,
Point my dick at your chest.
Then with hot sticky cum I will spray you.
But I have an idea - what say you?
I'll come over, undress,
Point my dick at your chest.
Then with hot sticky cum I will spray you.
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Crimson 2
For her guest, Jenny's nails were rich crimson.
He loves oral; she wants to give him some.
As a succulent treat,
She seized his dark meat.
Then she gobbled it like it was Dim Sum.
From the Nails Series.
He loves oral; she wants to give him some.
As a succulent treat,
She seized his dark meat.
Then she gobbled it like it was Dim Sum.
From the Nails Series.
Monday, December 12, 2011
Sunday, December 11, 2011
Technical Adviser
To get your movie's box-office soaring,
Please make sure that your hooker's not boring.
You would be very wise
To have Jenny advise.
She's THE world-renowned expert on whoring.
Please make sure that your hooker's not boring.
You would be very wise
To have Jenny advise.
She's THE world-renowned expert on whoring.
Saturday, December 10, 2011
Love in the Lift
Took sweet Jenny for a night on the town.
Penthouse bistro atop the Hotel Crowne.
We could not wait 'till later...
Once in the elevator,
Jenny knelt as she said "Going down!"
Penthouse bistro atop the Hotel Crowne.
We could not wait 'till later...
Once in the elevator,
Jenny knelt as she said "Going down!"
Friday, December 9, 2011
Midlife Crisis
Jenny's date reveled in turning forty.
Bought a new Lamborghini - quite sporty.
A Big Oil lobbyist
And experienced hobbyist.
She knew why all the girls call him "Shorty."
From the Date Series.
Bought a new Lamborghini - quite sporty.
A Big Oil lobbyist
And experienced hobbyist.
She knew why all the girls call him "Shorty."
From the Date Series.
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Chin Music
After her oral skills made me grin,
Jenny tucked my cock under her chin.
Such phenomenal head...
Then she laid back, legs spread.
And she begged, "Honey, please stick it in!"
Jenny tucked my cock under her chin.
Such phenomenal head...
Then she laid back, legs spread.
And she begged, "Honey, please stick it in!"
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Royal Jewelry
She's a favorite of Counts, Dukes and Earls.
Around her an air of mystery swirls.
The Prince knows she's the best,
So he straddled her breasts.
Then he gave her a necklace of pearls.
Around her an air of mystery swirls.
The Prince knows she's the best,
So he straddled her breasts.
Then he gave her a necklace of pearls.
Monday, December 5, 2011
Morning Glory
Want to be by your side when you wake up.
Before you're all coiffed and in makeup.
Just to lie there, admiring you,
Showing how I'm desiring you...
Just as soon as my wife and I break up.
Before you're all coiffed and in makeup.
Just to lie there, admiring you,
Showing how I'm desiring you...
Just as soon as my wife and I break up.
Sunday, December 4, 2011
Money Measurement
These three fellows used quarters to chart
The erect length of their male part.
I am sad to report
That they've all fallen short:
It takes more cash to win Jenny's heart.
The erect length of their male part.
I am sad to report
That they've all fallen short:
It takes more cash to win Jenny's heart.
Saturday, December 3, 2011
Clit-licious
Now, this photo's just pixels and light.
Still, just seeing it brings me delight.
Nothing else could be hotter.
Really makes my mouth water.
And my tongue craves to lick it all night.
Still, just seeing it brings me delight.
Nothing else could be hotter.
Really makes my mouth water.
And my tongue craves to lick it all night.
Friday, December 2, 2011
Girth Gift
Jenny's date had a dick that she found
Measure seven full inches around.
With a tape she made sure...
Then when he entered her,
Jenny made the most wonderful sound.
From the Date Series.
Measure seven full inches around.
With a tape she made sure...
Then when he entered her,
Jenny made the most wonderful sound.
From the Date Series.
Thursday, December 1, 2011
Stirred, Not Shaken
He attended to her like a Queen. He
Sought to serve her the perfect Martini.
He poured gin and vermouth.
But then faltered, uncouth,
When he stirred it with his erect weenie.
Sought to serve her the perfect Martini.
He poured gin and vermouth.
But then faltered, uncouth,
When he stirred it with his erect weenie.
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Scent of a Woman
As a lover you're sinfully gifted.
You know well how my spirits you've lifted.
I have such a strong bent
For your feminine scent
Since the first time I knelt down and sniffed it.
You know well how my spirits you've lifted.
I have such a strong bent
For your feminine scent
Since the first time I knelt down and sniffed it.
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Cheek
As you brush lovely nails o'er my cheek,
My heart flutters, hands shake, knees go weak.
Fingers glide down my torso,
Which I love even more, so
I am spellbound, unable to speak.
From the Nails Series.
My heart flutters, hands shake, knees go weak.
Fingers glide down my torso,
Which I love even more, so
I am spellbound, unable to speak.
From the Nails Series.
Monday, November 28, 2011
And A Smile
Jenny thought he was making a joke:
Said his dick was as big as a Coke.
Stood it next to a can...
Now she is a big fan.
Though to take it all in makes her choke.
Said his dick was as big as a Coke.
Stood it next to a can...
Now she is a big fan.
Though to take it all in makes her choke.
Sunday, November 27, 2011
Sacred Beauty
Saturday, November 26, 2011
Post-Parting Depression
Took a week-long trip to the East Coast.
Left behind the one girl I love most.
She said none could deliver
Pleasures my cock can give her.
Found herself giving head to a post.
Left behind the one girl I love most.
She said none could deliver
Pleasures my cock can give her.
Found herself giving head to a post.
Friday, November 25, 2011
Blown Cover
Jenny found her new date quite relatable.
Though not young, his sex skills were debatable.
In bed he was inept.
The secret he'd kept?
His girlfriend was cute... and inflatable.
From the Date Series.
Though not young, his sex skills were debatable.
In bed he was inept.
The secret he'd kept?
His girlfriend was cute... and inflatable.
From the Date Series.
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Slow-Moving
He was horny, but slow and so lazy.
Flops down on her bed; there he lays. He
Was so damn lethargic,
But had a nice large dick,
She jumped on it and fucked herself crazy.
Flops down on her bed; there he lays. He
Was so damn lethargic,
But had a nice large dick,
She jumped on it and fucked herself crazy.
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Impressionist
Nothing I do could ever impress you.
Clientele like yours has such success. You
Deserve loads of money.
But there's nothing quite, honey,
Like the fun we have when I undress you.
Clientele like yours has such success. You
Deserve loads of money.
But there's nothing quite, honey,
Like the fun we have when I undress you.
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Winter Rainbow
Jenny showed off her new attitude:
Fuzzy gloves and her nails multi-hued.
While at Starbucks we warmed,
Our day's agenda we formed.
My suggestions she thought were quite lewd.
From the Nails Series.
Fuzzy gloves and her nails multi-hued.
While at Starbucks we warmed,
Our day's agenda we formed.
My suggestions she thought were quite lewd.
From the Nails Series.
Monday, November 21, 2011
Drink Deep
I had just stopped by for a quick drink.
Raging lust, sat her up on the sink.
My desire - obsessive.
My approach - quite aggressive.
As I licked where she's luscious and pink.
Raging lust, sat her up on the sink.
My desire - obsessive.
My approach - quite aggressive.
As I licked where she's luscious and pink.
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Saturday, November 19, 2011
New Pride
You've made me so confident inside.
No more feeling like I have to hide.
You said my dick was "great!"
Now I don't hesitate,
And use locker-room showers with pride.
No more feeling like I have to hide.
You said my dick was "great!"
Now I don't hesitate,
And use locker-room showers with pride.
Friday, November 18, 2011
Burly
Jenny's date was a big man, and burly.
He showed up one dark day gruff and surly.
When she sucked on his wiener,
It improved his demeanor.
Spirits lifted, he left her place early.
From the Date Series.
He showed up one dark day gruff and surly.
When she sucked on his wiener,
It improved his demeanor.
Spirits lifted, he left her place early.
From the Date Series.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Chandelier
Bought my lover a new chandelier.
Lights that sparkle through crystals so clear.
The phallic design
Suits her taste just fine.
Jenny said, "It looks just like you, dear!"
Lights that sparkle through crystals so clear.
The phallic design
Suits her taste just fine.
Jenny said, "It looks just like you, dear!"
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Fetish
When I see pretty hands I'm delighted.
Manicured nails get me excited.
Orange, sky blue, or reddish.
I confess: it's my fetish.
All the time, though, my lust's unrequited.
From the Nails Series.
Manicured nails get me excited.
Orange, sky blue, or reddish.
I confess: it's my fetish.
All the time, though, my lust's unrequited.
From the Nails Series.
Monday, November 14, 2011
Post-Coital
I love to lay quietly beside you.
The one person in whom I confide. You
Are my wonderful lover.
A moment to recover,
Then I'll want my hard cock deep inside you.
The one person in whom I confide. You
Are my wonderful lover.
A moment to recover,
Then I'll want my hard cock deep inside you.
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Porntastic
I'm addicted to video porn.
I search for it each day, night and morn.
Watching hot sexy action,
Stroking brings satisfaction.
But my wife looks upon it with scorn.
I search for it each day, night and morn.
Watching hot sexy action,
Stroking brings satisfaction.
But my wife looks upon it with scorn.
Saturday, November 12, 2011
No Doubt
Of my love for you I have no doubt.
On those days that I must do without,
When I can't see your face,
Wrap you in my embrace...
I put on my tuxedo and pout.
On those days that I must do without,
When I can't see your face,
Wrap you in my embrace...
I put on my tuxedo and pout.
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